Ole's Guide to Computer Lingo

 
Log on
making d vood stove hotter

Log off
don't add no more vood

Monitor
keep an eye on d vood stove

Magahertz
vhen da big log drops on da barefoot in da morning

floppy disk
vhat you get from pilingk too much vood

ram
da hydraulic thing dat makes da voodsplitter vork

hard drive
getting home during most of da vinter

prompt
vhat ya vish da mail vas during da snow season

enter
come on in

windows
vhat ya sht when it gets below zero

screenv
vhat you gatta fix on da vindows during fly season

chip
vat ya munch on vit beer

microchip
vhat's left in da bag vhen da chips are gone

modem
vhat ya vant more of

laptop
vhere Mitzy sits

keyboard
vhere ya suppos to hang da keys so da mista can find em

software
silk undavare from Thailand

mouse
vhat leaves dem little turds in da cupboard

mainframe
da part of da house dat holds up da roof

port
a good vine

docking station
da same as port

random access memory
vhen ya can't remember how much ya spent on da new dress when da hubby asks about it

Forwarded by:
Peggy Kauffman, Mon, 22 Feb 1999
        
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